Friday, October 3, 2008

I wouldn't be three again...

Really, I would NOT be three again, not for anything in this world....

The Doglet Groomer has a three year old, a bright happy active exuberant boy. He tries to be good, tries to understand the world and what's expected of him. He doesn't always succeed very well, but he really does try, yanno?

This morning he tried to be part of our conversation, but she told him to let us talk without interrupting. He tried, he really did... he went back to playing (the only way he knows how--exuberantly *wry smile*) with his toy firetruck. He ran it past Lady and she objected, so I picked her up; then he moved away and I put her back down. He kept running that firetruck back our way, though, and his mom kept trying to redirect him.

He just really didn't get it. He ran the truck past Lady again and I wasn't fast enough; she bit him before I could stop her. He was pretty upset. She didn't even leave a mark, mind you--she was "disciplining an unruly puppy," I think--but oh, he was aggrieved! And his morning went downhill from there... every three year old knows what's "fair" have you noticed? And it most certainly is NOT fair that someone ELSE did something REALLY bad; Ladybug BIT him!!--can you hear his indignation?--and then *he* got in trouble! So of course he got more and more upset, acted out and then eventually he really DID get in trouble.

I felt so badly for him. I'm pretty certain he just honestly doesn't understand that he did something to make Lady snap at him. I'm also pretty certain that he doesn't understand why on earth he got in trouble when he was trying to be good.... well *wry smile* he doesn't get it that he's not very successful yet at "being good" lol... but the poor kid, and my poor friend, too--both having such a rough morning when it started out so happy!

I've been thinking about it all day. It is so HARD to be three! I've heard people envy kids their "carefree lives" and I don't think that's really it... I think kids are under a ton of stress, trying to understand how to be good in a world that is mostly incomprehensible, with rules that don't make sense and consequences that just aren't fair. I wouldn't wish being three on my worst enemy.... and yanno, I wouldn't wish going to school on my worst enemy either. I remember how hard it was, how it didn't make sense, how I didn't know how NOT to get into trouble, how scared I was when I got in trouble despite all my best efforts to behave. And yanno what? I don't want to bring that on my friend's little boy. I don't want to be part of what squashes him. He's bright and exuberant and I want him to stay that way.

I have to figure out how to explain Lady to him in a way a three year old can truly understand. He knows she isn't scared of him... but I think I will tell him she is scared of things with wheels, like firetrucks and his tricycle. I hope it will help him understand, help the world make sense to him.

.........gods, not for anything on this earth would I be a child again........ *sigh*

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